Kidisms

First, I have to apologize. I did something in my last post that is a cardinal sin. Something that makes me cringe every time I see it. A personal pet peve, right about up there with people who use the word irregardless. (sorry guys, that's a double negative, like saying "I'm going to un-thaw the meat" "Oh, honey, you're going to put it in the freezer??" It's either irrespective or regardless...irregardless is not a word.)

I typed their instead of there.

See, a person with such strong opinions on "irregardless" or "un-thaw" should be flogged for using their or they're or there incorrectly. Oh the depths I have fallen. The horor. So, please forgive me, everyone. I will try to be on better behavior. Spelling, I cannot do, (seriously, is it table or tabel? Label or Lable? ah crap, now I'm not sure which is right.....) So, yes, spelling I cannot do, but grammar I should be able to handle (or is it handel?) I'm probably the only person who got caught cheating on a 3rd grade spelling test (don't read that mom....). Yes, cheating at spelling. For shame. For shame.

So, the zoo was a rocking good time. Though I thought Hubby was going to go a bit postal on me in the car this morning.

There are two things that are bad for my marriage:
Putting together Ikea furniture
and
Reading directions

We are terrible at both. Actually, directions of any kind are very bad if we're together. We've nearly divorced over our bedroom set, nearly had to call in the cops for a domestic incident when we "put together" (and I use the words "we" and "put together" verrrry loosly) my elliptical machine, and any road trip tends to end in disaster.

Well, on this trip I forgot directions all together. (Take that!) Which, apparently is worse. Then the Emabassy lady gave us directions for coming from the SOUTH, not HEADING SOUTH on the freeway. I was nearly left at the side of the highway. But alas, we made it....... only to near divorce today, yet again.

So, we're heading to the zoo. Little did we know it was "mommy & me" day. Seriously? I have never SEEEEEEN so many people at the zoo. It took us an hour maybe more to make it 1.3 miles and find a parking spot. All the while I have to endure "I knew we shouldn't have gone swimming this morning and we should have come early" etc, etc, etc. But alas, we found a spot on some hill about 4 blocks from the zoo.

All in all, though, it was a good trip. I even invented the "car time out". Curious? I thought so. Here's how it goes. When you 1-day-short-of-being-2-year-old whines and cries for about 30 minutes enroute to the zoo, you then take away all the toys, blankets, lovies, etc that you have given her until she screems bloody murder. Then you turn around and say "if you can be good, you can have them back". This was much more effective that "if you don't stop crying, you won't get to a) go swimming b)play with your friends c) go to the zoo d) anything else i could think of taking away." No, the car time out gave us a good 45 minutes of happy baby. Phew.

To get you into the mind of my two year old (well, she will be tomorrow) I have to tell about the naughty baby book. We were reading this book about a baby who is naughty (they needed the car time out). Baby throws fits, spits, makes a mess, etc. Well on one baby baby is holding the ball while another baby cries. Page reads "Share the ball, baby, baby, baby please". Well, as I read it, I hear Little Miss say "Get your own ball, baby" to the crying baby. Yes, "Get your own ball." Sigh.

The last kidism was two days ago. Buddy came up to me while I was on the phone with my mom saying "mommy, i know who I want to be my new mommy. Kate!"
me: "baby, I'll always be your mommy"
b: "no, Kate!"
me: "Sweetie, she's your cousin (thinking abbreviated cousin nick name)"
My mom: "Uh, I think he means his wife."
me: "You mean like how uncle matt and auntie brittani are getting married"
b: "Yeah" (like where have you been??)
b: "Yeah, when I'm big and you're not my mommy."
me: "Then Kate from preschool will be your mommy."
b: "yep" runs out of room.
So, yes, my three year old already, apparently, has a girlfriend at school. His dad would be so proud....if not creeped out by the mommy reference. :)

Well, with a successful weekend away behind us, fun friends to share it w/ and a gaggle of people coming tomorrow, it's time to head.

happy m-day to all the mommies out there.

Don't worry, I screw up more than all of you put together!! :) If you don't believe me, read back through the posts!!

My big life change

Man. It has been too long again. Too many cute kid moments not memorialized for the world to remeber. For shame.

Here I am, with a disfigured club finger and no one to share it with. For those wondering the finger has undergone a lovely transformation and about 3/4 of it is now missing. It lead me to the fount of all earthly wisdom. I googled "How long does it take a fingernail to grow back?" that's right. The internet, useful for staying in contact with family, making business deals, world wide instant communication has about 2 billion hits for fingernails growing back. I think it is safe to say that we live in an age of excess! So, my hideous finger, according to my Google search, will be its lovely self in 6 to 18 months; not exactly what I was thinking... But hey, our PA friend says that they get people in the ER when they smash their finger. So I take pride in calling them ninnies.

Life has been crazy busy, and, even though I'm a bit of an admitted stress junkie, it's getting a tad overwhelming. I picked up another design client, which is good, Hubby is generating a lot of paperwork with his business (which is good, except for the stress because I'm the only one who knows if we have money or not!), school has been taking up about 15 hours a week, which is too many, and work has been religated to only 15 hours per week, which is probably not enough. I still have only about 12 hours of arranged child care. And, that math doesn't quuuuiiiite work out right! I temp myself out of bed in the morning by promising coffee with calorie ladden creamer to my tired body. The body no longer cares, though. I think I may have to buy whipped cream and up the ante a bit.

So, what is my big life change? People are going to laugh, but I've found a way to cope with the business while trying to keep a semblance of sanity: I use the dishwasher.

Shocking, no?

I've always used the dishwasher, just not a lot. I thought it "wasteful" to run it when it wasn't full. I though it "silly" to put pots, pans, measuring cups, blenders, in their. I thought it "terrible" to run it more than 3 times a week. Well, call me wasteful. Call me silly. Call me terrible. I run that puppy at least once a day, sometimes twice. Hand washing is a thing of the past at my house. You may think that I considered it theraputic or something to wash dishes. I did not. I'm about 2" too tall for a normal sink and it hurt my back. I just hand washed because it made more sense. It no longer makes more sense. So, I fire up the Whirlpool and enjoy all that modern convenience has to offer...if only they could make an option for "put everything away" I think I would have all the time I need for work.

Well, we are off to the big city this afternoon with the kiddos. We're staying at the Embassy Suites, the mecca for families. Why is it a mecca? Simple, really. There is a separate bedroom, allowing parents to retire at 10pm instead of 7 pm. There is a free breakfast, at which my children can arrive in their jammies if the spirit so moves. (Plus, bonus! there's no way we'll sleep past free breakfast hour!) And, it has things like cooked to order omlets and fruit. It has a pool. But the ringer? It has free alcohol from 7 to 9 pm. That's right. Free. A literal oasis in the desert of toddler-hood. Embassy Suites=greatest invention ever....totally, totally worth the $100.

Then, after we fill up on custom omlets, we plan to take the chillens to the zoo. Which reminds me that I need to charge the camera batteries. Well, though I have much more to write, I didn't drag my tired arse out of bed to do this. No, there are Australian ads to book, invoices to print (hopefully....please Lord let there be invoices to print!) and there are Geology rock labs to complete (PS, Geology is NOT a easy lab science. I soooooo should've chosen Astronomy or something....), there is cheesecake to make, a tort to finish, and a jello salad missing a top layer. There is toothpaste on the bathroom mirror, a nasty ring in the tub, remanents of another rock lab on the counter, apple peels from three weeks ago that need to get out to the compost pile, and some kind of grime all over the kitchen floor. I'd better fill my coffee cup.....